Thursday, June 6, 2013

See ya later Dad.....

Hi everyone! I have really been struggling with blogging about this for several weeks now but feel that it's time that I go ahead and let you all know. My dad passed away at home on May the 14th. He had been home just about 24 hours from the hospital after having knee surgery and passed away from complications after the surgery. My mom had to run some errands that day so I had told her that I would come stay with him while she got done what she needed to and even though dad felt weak we still had a really good day together. He had done really well for a man of his age to have knee surgery and was walking rather well on it. It was one of the best quality days and the worst day that I think I've ever spent with my dad. My mom hadn't been home long at all and I was gathering my things to leave when he passed. I hadn't taken my eyes off of him all day that day until I was getting ready to leave. He had a blood clot and I was told by Dr's that there was nothing that I could of done for him. Its been difficult but I'm not one that deals with grief in a normal way. (if there is a normal way) I'm terrible at suppressing emotions and then long after the fact when everyone else is starting to heal is when I usually fall apart. That's what is happening's starting to sink in with me that's he's gone on to a better place.
Just as my luck would have it. The night that we buried my dad, I had to call an ambulance to come get me because I had woke up in such excruciating pain that I couldn't find any position or anything to help relieve it. Come to find out it was a kidney stone. I was in the hospital for 5 days getting rid of that monster and don't ever want another one. Then after I had been home for about 3 days I kept having issues with one of my molar teeth that was bothering me pretty bad but I kept thinking "oh that's probably just where they put you to sleep or something no biggie Robin". Well that wasn't the case because I got in with the dentist on Tuesday and come to find out it was abscess and I had the option of either a root canal or pulling it. I said pull it! At this point it's just really really bad timing to have to have a root canal and I think that I've been in enough pain physically as well as emotionally for one month. I honestly don't think I can tolerate much more at this point and dare say "what's next?". Because I really don't want to know. But still I try to look at positives in everything. My dad didn't lay and suffer (as per the doctors they say blood clots are fast) and the removal of my kidney stone took care of some urological issues that I had been having for a long time plus it has forced me to drink more water and lay off  of the pepsi's. Which is better for my overall health in general. The biggest positive out of all of this though is that I know where my dad is at now...he's no longer suffering with any aches and pains and he has no worries or concerns anymore. Even though I miss him tremendously I wouldn't ask for him to be back for no nothing because he's in such a better place than myself right now. So instead of saying Rest in Peace, since I know he already is....I'm just going to say. See you later Dad and I Love You!!

1 comment:

  1. RObin, even tho I knew you had gone thru all this.. it looks like it finalllly has sunk in, and you are dealing with it after it finally hit u like a ton of bricks ! I am so looking forward to you to come to OKLAHOMA...some healing time here at the lake for sure.. laugh, giggle, wet our pants ! I am just antsy with anticipation ! Love you so much, hugs ! Suzie